So here�s why I was late this morning to work. Literally on the way out the door, the phone rings � it appears on caller id as a cell phone call. Intrigued, I pick it up. It�s AT&T with a courtesy call just for me! The emotionless women gets right to the punchline and asks if I want to make a payment � I say no, because I wrote a check and mailed the payment yesterday. She says I can still make a payment over the phone and when the check arrives I can use it as credit toward the next cycle. (Note: the payment is not even due until next week.)

Using my skills of LOGIC, I don�t see the advantage of doing that alternative she suggested so I say I�ll pass. She accepts my decline and asks me if there�s anything �else� she can do for me today. (Note: this is also the same company that we waited A MONTH to get phone service from all the while scheduling/rescheduling ficticious appointments on the phone almost every day that month. Phone service ordered May 6th � delivered June 3rd.)

Intrigued by her scripted offer to �help� in any way, I ask about the refund check which could not be transferred to my new account for some reason and why its not in my hands yet having cancelled service April 30th. �Oh I�ll have to transfer you to that department.� As in, they have a separate department for reimbursing and another for billing and receiving.

The lovely gentleman on that connection told me my check was mailed and returned (from the old address) a week ago. I ask him to reissue a check to the appropriate address which was a task clearly out of his level of responsibility. The exact words were, �Oh we don�t just drop checks [like you humans do.] That will be a different department which I�ll have to fill out a form to establish a case for your missing check.� Irate as I was, I asked that he go ahead and do that which he began to disapprove of my choice. �Well ma�am, if I were you I wouldn�t be kicking up such a big fuss over a $25.41 check.� I proceeded to tell him that it was AT&T�s courtesy call that brought me to him and that in my world $25 stolen dollars is worth kicking up a lot of fuss especially if the same company keeps asking for more money from me � but thanks for your thoughtful opinion.

Needless to say we didn�t see eye to eye on this matter and he was of no help so I hung up and decided to be only half an hour late to work as a result of their courtesy.

At the office I called first thing in the morning to get to the bottom of the mystery. During the 15min. hold time I got to listen to this statement over and over:

�We are experiencing slight delays due to the positive response of AT&T services.�

I was then transferred to a special accounting department in India which told me that they have no record of it being returned and that I have to wait 40 business days for it to �get over there� before I ask them to begin a search committee for my missing check. I was thrice offered to set up local and long distance services with them despite the fact that I already do.

For the duration of the day I�ve been running through my head all the things I can buy with $25.